Heaven’s Gate Minute by Minute: 73 of 229

1 Sep

73 of 229

Ella! The love interest character’s name is revealed! James swigs at a hipflask to calm his nerves as Ella, at the helm of the wagon, drives at tremendous speed! Well, it’s not that tremendous. It’s not comparable to a Formula 1 car, supersonic jet, or Saturn V rocket. Why didn’t James buy her a rocket? Ah, that’s right; it’s the 19th century and pressure suits weren’t invented.

The carriage handles horribly. It’s bumpy, slides all over the road and the rear spoiler appears to be doing nothing. Our planet may be choked with CO2, but I’m glad the motorcar rendered those terrible things redundant…

Alright, I admit it – I love wagons! I love their character, the craftsmanship and their retro charm! Speaking of retro charm, Ella drives to the village where a large group photo is being taken. The photographer has his magnesium flash at the ready. I’m waiting for the wet plate negative, magnesium flash photography craze to take-off again. Surely one hundred and fifty years is long enough for it to become cool again. It’ll be called “Not-very-instant-a-gram”.

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